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My sister brought a beautiful baby girl earthside in December.


Within a week it was discovered that she needed surgery to remove a blockage from her intestine.


Her healthcare providers began testing her to see what had caused the blockage. She was then diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis.


She is still in the hospital and her medical journey is only just beginning.


Please consider supporting her and her family by donating.


Thank you from the bottoms of our hearts <3

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Conflict is not limited to people who are going through separation and divorce.

Conflict is prevalent in almost all facets of our lives.


And in our most important relationships, the relationships we have with our children, conflict is inevitable.



I recently began reading the book No-Drama Discipline by Daniel Siegel and Tina Bryson and have been gaining valuable insight on how to manage conflicts with my children.


What is especially wonderful is that the insight I have gained can also be applied to the conflicts I experience with the adults in my life.





Here are some of the basics:


Stay Curious - What's going on with the child (or adult) you're in conflict with?


Connect - Empathetically reach out to the child (or adult) you're in conflict with.


How do you feel when you're upset and not handling yourself well?


Re-Direct - Turn the attention towards your desired outcome.



Sometimes our children are hungry or tired, and conflict is easily managed through a snack or a nap, but other times it might be more difficult to navigate.


No child (or adult), is going to be on their best behaviour 100% of the time (I'm certainly not!).


Managing the conflicts we experience with our children might not be brain science, but it can sure be difficult when they a throw toy at their newborn sibling's head for the trillionth time (...from personal experience, I can tell you I'm about ready to lose it about this one).



I appreciated this book's honesty that this method will not work all the time nor will it be easy all of the time. Luckily for me I will be a parent for the rest of my life so I will get many opportunities to practice managing the conflicts I experience with my children!


Another thing that I appreciated about this book is that it has a synopsis ("cheat-sheet") at the back that you can share with other people who care for your children - this could be especially helpful for parents who are in a co-parenting relationship and do not see eye to eye with the other parent on how to manage conflict and discipline.



Like with any conflict, conflict with our children is an opportunity to gain understanding and to strengthen the bond we share.


When we handle conflict poorly, we may damage our relationships.

When we handle conflict collaboratively and respectfully, we deepen our connection.


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Here in Saskatchewan our COVID-19 numbers are on the rise and because of that many people are staying home (especially with the new restrictions).


During this time you might be experiencing conflict, even if you are sheltering with the people you love the most.


Conflict is a part of the human experience and does not need to be avoided. What does need to be avoided is handling conflict in a toxic manner.


When handled constructively, conflict can help people come to a deeper understanding of each. What better way to spend your time in quarantine than to learn more about the people you care about?


So how can we handle conflict in a healthy way when in lockdown?


One way is to understand that we are having the shared experience of living through a pandemic. This situation is causing an enormous amount of stress for everyone. The experience of stress puts us into the emotional part of our brain and triggers our fight, flight, or freeze response. When we are in this state, it is difficult for us to think rationally, which can easily make conflicts evolve into heated disputes.


When a conflict arises in your home, take a moment, observe what is going on within yourself, and give compassion to yourself and the person you are in conflict with. Some conflicts need resolution, while others just need acceptance. Because we are individuals, we are never going to agree on all things.


Agreeing to disagree is sometimes the best outcome. We can give each other respect and acceptance in conflicts by simply saying "We just see things differently, and that's okay. I respect you and care about you for the individual you are." At other times a conflict might be causing damage to the relationship and at those times listening to the other person's needs and brainstorming with that person ways that can mutually satisfy both of your needs is necessary.


There are many ways to have productive conversations about conflicts. It can be interesting and illuminating to work through a conflict with the person you are in disagreement with. If you are interested in tools and resources to help you engage in conflict in a constructive way, follow our blog and our social media accounts for more tips and recommendations. You can also book a coaching session with us for individual help or a mediation session for us to work with you and the person you are in conflict with. We are happy to be able to provide online services so that you can be safe and comfortable during the current public health situation and still receive the services that you need.


For inquiries, please contact us at themarriagemediators@gmail.com



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